What did I think...hmmmm. Well I thought it was a decent book. I really did. I even waited 24 hours to write my review to think on it and make sure my thoughts didn't change. And they didn't. I still want to throw this book out of a window....or off of a roof...and possibly stab it with a screw driver. But I won't because its a digital book on my iPad and I like my iPad so no violence to the book.
With that said this book had its ups and downs. I love a good mystery but this one almost took it to a frustrating level. Its a flash back story. Meaning it starts in a present day type scenario and flashes back to the past. But the whole book takes place in 1990...flashing back to previous events to move the story forward. There are a few characters to keep up with but the main focus is Penelope as she is telling the story. She has been in trouble and got in more trouble and is trying to make her life right.
I will say it is a relatable story. Not because I got in trouble but because we have all had to make difficult decisions to protect ourselves or fit in. Pen is troubled, that is evident. She makes STUPID decisions, that is also evident but you can't help but be understanding. She is damaged and scared, of course she doesn't always choose the right path but she is a good person...right.
It was a little twisty...slightly turney and very frustrating. It does keep you guessing for the most part which is nice. I did have my suspicions but the author did a decent job of distracting me so that I didn't focus long enough to say "AH HA!". I couldn't give it more than 3 stars because of a certain reason I can't reveal...SPOILERS. It was interesting enough but I wouldn't go out of my way to read it.
SPOILERS
What the hell was that ending?!!?!? I mean the entire book I wanted to slap Pen and say STOP LYING! Stop being deceitful. You are getting a fresh start...STOP! But she always hid things. She trusted the wrong people. She hurt people. I got pissed as a college student but I would NEVER purposefully drug someone. That is some sociopath level stuff there. I also wouldn't have trusted Rogan. He was pretty but something was off from the start. I just never thought, oh stand up guy. I also didn't trust Michael...he screamed "I'm going to be a mass murderer one day"...very creepy. Rachel was conflicted but not all bad. I really liked Toby, he was a good friend.
Pen just chose wrong all the time. I never got why she lied to EVERYONE. I know her and Tracey did some bad things but I really think Pen was the bad influence. She is a manipulator. She had some redeeming qualities but she lied SO MUCH. I mean I get your friend is embarrassed about being almost raped but you tell someone. You don't save her...then lie about everything and let her take the fall for a death. You don't see something bad happen and go quiet. You don't have your SLEEPING PILLS stolen and not report it. You don't like about how someone died. Michael was going to kill her...why lie and say he jumped. Why not say "he was trying to kill me and I pushed him by accident". Its a much more believable story...more truth. After all of that I really started to distrust Pen...WHY LIE!?!?
That is why the ending made me insane. What the frick happened??? She is in the interrogation room. They have her diary and...she flashes back...way back to when she first met Tracey. To the last time she was sort of happy and it ends. What?!?! Sooooo its left open to interpretation...I guess. She was clearly guilty of something. Maybe she was the murderer all along and she fooled us, the reader. I don't know and I'll never know because it freaking ended! So was she really mental? Tracey is dead and can't help her...plus she LIED. Rogan wouldn't help her. Michael 7 Rachel are dead. Toby is probably traumatized. I don't know...maybe I'm over thinking it but I really feel like the whole book was a ruse. A ruse told by Pen. its her skewed version of reality. There was way more to it than what we are told...right?!!?
I received this book for free from House Party, Random House, & Net Galley to read and give my honest review.
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